LOST SOUL -
When, O Lord, will I find my soul? It is lost and wandering. It has been spent and bruised. Perhaps, it is huddled behind a bush, tucked away in a corner somewhere still healing. I keep looking for it and simply cannot find it. I keep pressing on, soul-less. I ache for my soul. I miss it so much. Perhaps, it is lying somewhere like a deflated balloon barely noticeable on the pavement. Perhaps, it is wandering in the darkness desperately seeking the light and groping for the switch.
When, O Lord, will I find my soul?
I am not right without it.
When, O Lord, will I find my soul?
Are you holding it, mending it, tending it, healing it, speaking to it in words no ear can hear? Are you molding it, working it, fashioning it for something new?
When, O Lord, will I find my soul?
I want to be me again. Please let it not take forty years. Nine months its been. As long as Mary was pregnant, or most any woman before giving birth.
In this season of birthing - can my soul be birthed anew?
When, O Lord, will I find my soul?
I wait. I can do no more, but to wait on you. Just know, that I am waiting to find my soul and trusting it is with you.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
USE OF CHURCH PARKING LOT #5:
Teaching your teenager how to park! (Between the lines!)
Yup, looking out the window this afternoon and watching a parent teach their teen how to park. Good thing it's all angle parking. If it was parallel, they'd still be here!!!
Teaching your teenager how to park! (Between the lines!)
Yup, looking out the window this afternoon and watching a parent teach their teen how to park. Good thing it's all angle parking. If it was parallel, they'd still be here!!!
Monday, December 21, 2009
NEW SHOES ARRIVED!
They pretty much fit, although I have to break them in. My bunions complain about that!
This week I have two funerals; one Tuesday and one Wednesday.
I didn't know either. Thankfully, another minister will be giving the message for the one.
I haven't had such a hectic week of Christmas before. I put in an 11 hour Sunday and today, I am still tired. Although, maybe it is fatigue from all the emotionalism of meeting with two sets of families yesterday.
Snow has fallen, highlighting the trees, covering the grass and roof tops. It sure looks pretty. Wish I had the Christmas spirit this year, but it has eluded and evaded me.
Wish you all a most wonderfully blessed and glorious Christmas and a New Year burgeoning with hope and promise. Peace, Joy and Love be yours.
They pretty much fit, although I have to break them in. My bunions complain about that!
This week I have two funerals; one Tuesday and one Wednesday.
I didn't know either. Thankfully, another minister will be giving the message for the one.
I haven't had such a hectic week of Christmas before. I put in an 11 hour Sunday and today, I am still tired. Although, maybe it is fatigue from all the emotionalism of meeting with two sets of families yesterday.
Snow has fallen, highlighting the trees, covering the grass and roof tops. It sure looks pretty. Wish I had the Christmas spirit this year, but it has eluded and evaded me.
Wish you all a most wonderfully blessed and glorious Christmas and a New Year burgeoning with hope and promise. Peace, Joy and Love be yours.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
NOBEL PEACE PRIZE
I guess I'm still pondering and stewing over awarding the Nobel Peace Prize to our President Obama. I'm mystified as to what he has done or done so far that is so deserving of this prestigious award. In my mind, he hasn't accomplished all that much except to get elected President and then having to deal with the economic crisis. Certainly, not up there with most past recepients of the NPP.
If you ask me, Greg Mortensen is far more deserving of the NPP than President Obama. He has done more in forging and developing relationships in Afghanistan/Pakistan and built schools to educate children, especially girls in order to bring about change. He has built trust, sacrificed much in his genuine care and passion for the people and children of this part of the world. And he does it without political attachments.
And it all started with a not so simple promise to build a school, to give the gift of thanks and appreciation to one tiny improvished village.
Yup, Greg Mortensen would've gotten my vote and in my mind and spirit is the true Nobel Peace Prize winner.
I guess I'm still pondering and stewing over awarding the Nobel Peace Prize to our President Obama. I'm mystified as to what he has done or done so far that is so deserving of this prestigious award. In my mind, he hasn't accomplished all that much except to get elected President and then having to deal with the economic crisis. Certainly, not up there with most past recepients of the NPP.
If you ask me, Greg Mortensen is far more deserving of the NPP than President Obama. He has done more in forging and developing relationships in Afghanistan/Pakistan and built schools to educate children, especially girls in order to bring about change. He has built trust, sacrificed much in his genuine care and passion for the people and children of this part of the world. And he does it without political attachments.
And it all started with a not so simple promise to build a school, to give the gift of thanks and appreciation to one tiny improvished village.
Yup, Greg Mortensen would've gotten my vote and in my mind and spirit is the true Nobel Peace Prize winner.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
ADVENT FUNNY 2:
Here's another I ran across somewhere over the years!
The little boy was the innkeeper in the church's Christmas pagaent. He practiced his line, "Sorry, we have no room."
The day of the pagaent arrived and Mary and Joseph knocked on the inn door.
On cue the little boy looked at Joseph and Mary and said his line, "Sorry, we have no room." As Mary and Joseph dejectedly turned away, the boy said, "but you can come in for a cup of coffee."
Think it was a Lutheran Christmas pagaent?!!!?
Here's another I ran across somewhere over the years!
The little boy was the innkeeper in the church's Christmas pagaent. He practiced his line, "Sorry, we have no room."
The day of the pagaent arrived and Mary and Joseph knocked on the inn door.
On cue the little boy looked at Joseph and Mary and said his line, "Sorry, we have no room." As Mary and Joseph dejectedly turned away, the boy said, "but you can come in for a cup of coffee."
Think it was a Lutheran Christmas pagaent?!!!?
GOD IN THE ORDINARY AND MUNDANE:
God has been fairly quiet the last few months. I mentioned that I am still praying to the Great Silence.
Well, it was a very cold morning and only about 25 today. So, I put on my grey wool pants (what a find at Talbot's outlet in Sept!), my grey cashmere blend socks (really keep my toes warm), a cream mockneck and my tweedy sweater cardigan.
I found the nubby,tweedy, blend of acrylic, poly, alpaca and mohair, one button cardigan at a discount retailer (which is always a hit and miss). It's grey, cream, camel, mocha colored which matches grey, khaki, ivory, taupe, etc. It even fits very well and nicely. I like the colors (neutral)and it is very warm. The price was right at $29.95. I think it was quite the find back in late Oct. before my move and beginning this interim.
I have often found that when I need certain clothing, shoes, etc. items and I find them, God has had a hand in it. When I go looking and nothing is quite right, or doesn't fit, or I can't find my (ample)size, then I know that God is saying, "Now is not the time." It's oddly strange but it just seems to work out that way.
I really didn't have money to spend on this wonderful cardigan, but I knew it would be go with several items and be warm.
This morning, as I sat in my office, feeling its warmth and softness wrapped around me, it was as though God was wrapping me in it to assure me and comfort me as a sign of God's providence and love. It was overwhelming and the Great Silence spoke in the ordinary, mundane, and earthly. Something I might not have paid much attention to at any other time. God reaches to us through even the simple, and material things around us.
This wonderfully warm sweater cardigan is something I will treasure and cherish not only through this winter season, but in many winter seasons to come. I cannot put it on without knowing that God has wrapped me in his love and care and even in this semi-exile God is reminding me that God is with me and providing for me. What a gift and a grace this has been.
Who would ever have thought that in an ordinary, simple, of no real account material thing like a sweater cardigan, God would make God's presence known? Only the God who would break into our world and lives on a dark night, in a little out of the way place like Bethlehem, in a grungy, smelly stable, as a new born baby! God comes to us in a myriad of ways to make known God's love. Thanks and praise be to God!
God has been fairly quiet the last few months. I mentioned that I am still praying to the Great Silence.
Well, it was a very cold morning and only about 25 today. So, I put on my grey wool pants (what a find at Talbot's outlet in Sept!), my grey cashmere blend socks (really keep my toes warm), a cream mockneck and my tweedy sweater cardigan.
I found the nubby,tweedy, blend of acrylic, poly, alpaca and mohair, one button cardigan at a discount retailer (which is always a hit and miss). It's grey, cream, camel, mocha colored which matches grey, khaki, ivory, taupe, etc. It even fits very well and nicely. I like the colors (neutral)and it is very warm. The price was right at $29.95. I think it was quite the find back in late Oct. before my move and beginning this interim.
I have often found that when I need certain clothing, shoes, etc. items and I find them, God has had a hand in it. When I go looking and nothing is quite right, or doesn't fit, or I can't find my (ample)size, then I know that God is saying, "Now is not the time." It's oddly strange but it just seems to work out that way.
I really didn't have money to spend on this wonderful cardigan, but I knew it would be go with several items and be warm.
This morning, as I sat in my office, feeling its warmth and softness wrapped around me, it was as though God was wrapping me in it to assure me and comfort me as a sign of God's providence and love. It was overwhelming and the Great Silence spoke in the ordinary, mundane, and earthly. Something I might not have paid much attention to at any other time. God reaches to us through even the simple, and material things around us.
This wonderfully warm sweater cardigan is something I will treasure and cherish not only through this winter season, but in many winter seasons to come. I cannot put it on without knowing that God has wrapped me in his love and care and even in this semi-exile God is reminding me that God is with me and providing for me. What a gift and a grace this has been.
Who would ever have thought that in an ordinary, simple, of no real account material thing like a sweater cardigan, God would make God's presence known? Only the God who would break into our world and lives on a dark night, in a little out of the way place like Bethlehem, in a grungy, smelly stable, as a new born baby! God comes to us in a myriad of ways to make known God's love. Thanks and praise be to God!
Monday, December 14, 2009
Advent Funny -
Ran across this one and can't remember from where it came:
Advent had just begun, so one Mom thought she'd see what the children remembered from their family devotions the year before. "Who can tell me what the four candles in the Advent wreath represent?" she asked.
Her son, Luke, jumped in with seven-year old wisdom and exuberance. "There's love, joy, peace, and...and..."
"I know!" five year old Elise interrupted to finish her brother's sentence: "Peace and quiet!"
May you enjoy some peace and quiet as we approach the fourth Sunday in Advent and Christmas Eve.
Ran across this one and can't remember from where it came:
Advent had just begun, so one Mom thought she'd see what the children remembered from their family devotions the year before. "Who can tell me what the four candles in the Advent wreath represent?" she asked.
Her son, Luke, jumped in with seven-year old wisdom and exuberance. "There's love, joy, peace, and...and..."
"I know!" five year old Elise interrupted to finish her brother's sentence: "Peace and quiet!"
May you enjoy some peace and quiet as we approach the fourth Sunday in Advent and Christmas Eve.
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
OUR 22ND ANNIVERSARY -
Saturday, LH and I exchanged anniversary cards. It was our 22nd year together. (Really, only 21 years of actually living together.) 11 months and 2 weeks before our first anniversary, we actually moved in together. Yup, ours was a commuter marriage for the first year. Not something I recommend to couples at pre-marital counseling. Not something I would want to repeat.
But, here, 22 years later, we are living apart again. Only this time, we're only an hour away, instead of 8 hours, and only 50.4 miles instead of 400 miles.
I miss LH. I miss not being home even at the end of a very long day. I miss not falling into bed and knowing he is there. I miss not having dinner together, even if it was only 3 nights in one week with all of our many meetings. I miss the Boys.
Even though LH is often in the den on the computer, while I'm in the family room with the greys, we are still together.
Perhaps, this time apart after 22 years, will refresh our relationship. Maybe, we will appreciate one another more and realize more fully what we mean to one another, and come to know all that the other did to keep the household intact and running smoothly and semi-cleanly.
I pray that the year will go by quickly - although I know one should never wish away time. Time, after all is so very precious and it goes by in the blink of an eye. There are so many who wish they had more time. So, I know I ought not to wish it away, but still...the year ahead seems to stretch interiminally before me. I will have to be content with the way that this time, this year will unfold.
The sacrifices of ministry are many. It's hard enough never to spend Christmas, or Easter or most any holiday with family who aren't living right around the corner. I haven't spent a Christmas with my family in 25 years. It's even harder, when you can't even go home at night to be with your spouse. There are times, when I ache for what I have given up as a minister.
I only have begun to feel this in the last year, as though, turning 50, brings to mind that the majority of my life has been spent and there remains much less before me. I'm beginning to feel that should I be fortunate enough to retire one day, I will really retire - no Presbytery meetings, serving on committees, supply preaching unless I really felt like it, etc. Just volunteering for mission - like delivering Meals On Wheels and the like. I hope that God will bless me with a time of "retirement" to spend time with LH and family and doing those things for which I never had the time or energy.
In the meanwhile, Advent beckons and with it the things that need tending and doing. It is afterall, that time.
Saturday, LH and I exchanged anniversary cards. It was our 22nd year together. (Really, only 21 years of actually living together.) 11 months and 2 weeks before our first anniversary, we actually moved in together. Yup, ours was a commuter marriage for the first year. Not something I recommend to couples at pre-marital counseling. Not something I would want to repeat.
But, here, 22 years later, we are living apart again. Only this time, we're only an hour away, instead of 8 hours, and only 50.4 miles instead of 400 miles.
I miss LH. I miss not being home even at the end of a very long day. I miss not falling into bed and knowing he is there. I miss not having dinner together, even if it was only 3 nights in one week with all of our many meetings. I miss the Boys.
Even though LH is often in the den on the computer, while I'm in the family room with the greys, we are still together.
Perhaps, this time apart after 22 years, will refresh our relationship. Maybe, we will appreciate one another more and realize more fully what we mean to one another, and come to know all that the other did to keep the household intact and running smoothly and semi-cleanly.
I pray that the year will go by quickly - although I know one should never wish away time. Time, after all is so very precious and it goes by in the blink of an eye. There are so many who wish they had more time. So, I know I ought not to wish it away, but still...the year ahead seems to stretch interiminally before me. I will have to be content with the way that this time, this year will unfold.
The sacrifices of ministry are many. It's hard enough never to spend Christmas, or Easter or most any holiday with family who aren't living right around the corner. I haven't spent a Christmas with my family in 25 years. It's even harder, when you can't even go home at night to be with your spouse. There are times, when I ache for what I have given up as a minister.
I only have begun to feel this in the last year, as though, turning 50, brings to mind that the majority of my life has been spent and there remains much less before me. I'm beginning to feel that should I be fortunate enough to retire one day, I will really retire - no Presbytery meetings, serving on committees, supply preaching unless I really felt like it, etc. Just volunteering for mission - like delivering Meals On Wheels and the like. I hope that God will bless me with a time of "retirement" to spend time with LH and family and doing those things for which I never had the time or energy.
In the meanwhile, Advent beckons and with it the things that need tending and doing. It is afterall, that time.
NEW SHOES -
I really didn't plan on getting any new shoes, after all, we're living on a very tight budget. Since I have such trouble finding shoes I can actually wear without hurting my feet (bunions and all), I am content with my old ones. This morning I put on my pair of dark brown Soft Spots that I've had for 3-5 years with nary a thought.
I got to church, took care of some administrative things, went to bathroom and noticed some rough black edges around the left toe. Hhhmm...I thought. I slipped off the shoe and the sole was split from the upper shoe. I've never had that ever happen before and have no idea when it happened. I was going to drop off a game at the Salvation Army, but went home to change shoes first. Otherwise, they would think I was in need of a pair of shoes. Sigh. They don't make that model anymore. I had to order a suede wedge over the internet. Where else is one to find an 11W? I have no clue if they will fit. That's why I hate ordering shoes online or through a catalogue. But, if you find a shoe in a store that you like and it is a major manufacturer, I have to go online to get in my size. And if it doesn't fit right, I have to send it back. (more $$). I wish that stores would carry 11's and wides more frequently.
I saw a cute pair at Kohl's this past fall. I was thrilled to see they were dark brown. When I looked for an 11, no luck. I looked at the tag and the shoe only came up to a 10, which although I tried on was a bit too short. How disappointing.
Well, I hope the new shoes fit. I will take the old ones home to prove to LH that a new pair were in order!!! I only hope I haven't been wearing such air conditioned shoes for too long. I think not. I would have noticed it.
Speaking of things destroyed beyond repair, Jazz chewed through the wire of one of our window candles last week. Chewed it clean through. Fortunately, it was close enough to the plug so that LH could go to the big home store and get a new plug which he spliced together and the candle works just fine once again. Jazz has never chewed through any wires before and we're thankful, that it wasn't plugged in at the time. Although, come to think of it, perhaps a little shock might have detered him from ever attempting such a foolish thing again!!!
Hope the new shoes arrive by next Friday. Sure could use them this Friday!
I really didn't plan on getting any new shoes, after all, we're living on a very tight budget. Since I have such trouble finding shoes I can actually wear without hurting my feet (bunions and all), I am content with my old ones. This morning I put on my pair of dark brown Soft Spots that I've had for 3-5 years with nary a thought.
I got to church, took care of some administrative things, went to bathroom and noticed some rough black edges around the left toe. Hhhmm...I thought. I slipped off the shoe and the sole was split from the upper shoe. I've never had that ever happen before and have no idea when it happened. I was going to drop off a game at the Salvation Army, but went home to change shoes first. Otherwise, they would think I was in need of a pair of shoes. Sigh. They don't make that model anymore. I had to order a suede wedge over the internet. Where else is one to find an 11W? I have no clue if they will fit. That's why I hate ordering shoes online or through a catalogue. But, if you find a shoe in a store that you like and it is a major manufacturer, I have to go online to get in my size. And if it doesn't fit right, I have to send it back. (more $$). I wish that stores would carry 11's and wides more frequently.
I saw a cute pair at Kohl's this past fall. I was thrilled to see they were dark brown. When I looked for an 11, no luck. I looked at the tag and the shoe only came up to a 10, which although I tried on was a bit too short. How disappointing.
Well, I hope the new shoes fit. I will take the old ones home to prove to LH that a new pair were in order!!! I only hope I haven't been wearing such air conditioned shoes for too long. I think not. I would have noticed it.
Speaking of things destroyed beyond repair, Jazz chewed through the wire of one of our window candles last week. Chewed it clean through. Fortunately, it was close enough to the plug so that LH could go to the big home store and get a new plug which he spliced together and the candle works just fine once again. Jazz has never chewed through any wires before and we're thankful, that it wasn't plugged in at the time. Although, come to think of it, perhaps a little shock might have detered him from ever attempting such a foolish thing again!!!
Hope the new shoes arrive by next Friday. Sure could use them this Friday!
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